Pension Plan Puppets: Politicians Hate Power and Scotiabank Hates Toronto

Every Leafs fan has an opinion. Here's mine: We are all Pension Plan Puppets. The Teachers pull the strings and we dance.

Wednesday, May 30, 2007

Politicians Hate Power and Scotiabank Hates Toronto

Update: Join the Anti-Scotia Pledge Facebook group here.

I had to end my off-season hiatus to address this story. I will go back into hibernation afterwards but I hope that any residents of Toronto will consider this treachery at the polls in the next municipal election.

Glove tap to Mirtle for finding an article that solidifies my personal belief that becoming a politician involves some sort of process in which the brain is removed. Mayor David Miller, besieged on all sides by a greedy council, the risk of bankruptcy, and increasingly upset natives has decided to seal his political fate by being the first to sign a pledge to support the sens in order to bring the Cup back to Canada.
To spread the word to Torontonians, Scotiabank will be distributing 50,000 copies of the pledge on Thursday May 31st from 7 to 9:30 a.m. at Union Station and the intersection of Yonge and Bloor.
Here is the draft of the pledge:

The Scotia Pledge

I, __________ devoted fan of the ____________________________ solemly (sic, idiots!) swear to set aside team rivalries for the duration of the season and pledge my support to the remaining Canadian team. I hereby dedicate my hockey-loving soul to their quest to bring the glory home to the place where hockey was born, where the game was perfected, where its spirit runs deepest, and where the world's greatest trophy belongs.

To make the pledge, visit (Pledge goes live Thursday May 31st at 5 a.m.)

I encourage everyone that, like me, walks to Union Station to make their morning commute to heckle the idiots behind this jingoistic and shortsighted pledge. Failing the intestinal fortitude to yell at total strangers without having paid a ticket to do so I suggest accepting multiple copies o the pledge and either throwing them in the garbage.

Not to belabour a point but the Cup lives in Canada ALL-YEAR ROUND. Not just that, it's in freaking Toronto, ACROSS THE STREET FROM UNION STATION! Seriously, it's one team made up of mostly Canadians playing against another team of mostly Canadians. Unless it's a INTERNATIONAL tournamen sports are tribal. Stop trying to change that. I blame political correctness for this travesty of a pledge drive.



Blogger Senator42 said...

Sorry to burst your bubble PPP, but the Cup doesn't live across the street from Union Station. It lives across the street and down a block at Front & Yonge.
That's one of the problems about Leafs fans. They can't see past the Blue & White so far that I suspect that none of them have ever been to the HHOF because there is too much glory for teams other than the Leafs.
I mean, how many Leafs fans think that the NHL started with the Original Six?

8:10 AM

Blogger PPP said...

Across the street sounds better than across the street and down a block ;)

Plus, it's on the other side of the street also known as across the street. You're just being pedantic out of rage at last night's loss and I understand that.

Was Alfredsson dressed last night? I must have missed him...

8:25 AM

Blogger Senator42 said...

Re: Alfie: "Very Ouch Baby!" -- Austin Powers...

Yeah that game was pretty exciting except that the longer it went on the more you could see that Ottawa didn't show up once again. It will be different on Saturday with the home corwd (I'll be there up in the nosebleeds!) but the odds are firmly against us. I just hope we can make a showing...
If Ottawa can get their speed on the series coudl change.

8:33 AM

Blogger PPP said...

The shocking difference is how easily the Ducks hit the neutral zone with speed after dump-ins whereas the sens are hassled.

It took until the third period for me to see the sens do that twice in a row.

The sens crowd will help. The first goal will help. The few seconds that the Pizza Line will get before the Pahlsson line gets out will help but I can't see that being enough.

11:01 AM


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